Saving an Animal's Life: Could You Do It? | No, YOU Need To Calm Down!

I love animals. Do you? Well, I love most. Some gross me out. But, I still feel that instinct to protect them, like I would a child. Sure, if I’m getting chased by a tiger, I’m not going to be as worried about it spraining it’s ankle on the rocky terrain (specific description of environment due to recurring dream – maybe I should look into that?), as I am about it catching and eating me. But, to save one’s life in an emergency situation, I think I could probably give any dog that belongs to me mouth to mouth. Because I know where that dog’s mouth has been. Not good places, but the knowing makes it better. I’m very aware I will have to gargle with bleach afterwards.

So then there’s the very real, doable ways to save animal lives. I’m sure most of us remember watching the Price Is Right and hearing Bob Barker reminding everyone to have their pets spayed or neutered. Awesome start. But, there is an overabundance of dogs and cats in shelters as a result, mainly, I think – but, I’m no expert, of this not being done. There are enough that many have to be killed every day because there is just no room. Hmmm. So, thinking every little bit helps, if you read Our Better Best Friends, you know that I at one time had 4 dogs – 2 from shelters, 1 from a rescue, and 1 straight off of the street. You may remember this is also what has us at a standstill getting our next dog. I want to rescue, we are trying to be specific about a breed and age due to such little ones in the house, so for now we’re stuck.

Then there are the people who go bigger, above and beyond, in my opinion. These are the people who will foster an animal, usually pulled from a shelter by a rescue group, many times right before their death. They take care of these dogs and cats until a permanent home can be found. My thought has always been that these are the people who really save the most animal lives. But, even before I had kids, I never thought I could have it in me to do this. The fear of just becoming attached to every one and not being able to let it go ( I believe this is called a foster fail when you end up adopting one of your fosters as your own). It takes a special kind of person to be able to do this, and I just had to find out what it is that they can see or feel differently than I do, to be able to do this. I thought if I shared a real story of a foster, their view, what is involved, maybe some of you out there who thought you could never do it either, see it in a new way and may be inspired to take it on. I put word out to the people I know who I thought were, or had been at one time, fosters. Tracy responded, and here is what she had to say:

How I got into it…

It all started back in 2008. I was in my last year of graduate school in Florida and was living with my now-husband, Seth. We had an adorable five-year-old beagle (Burt) who unexpectedly died of cancer at the end of October, and we were absolutely devastated. The night Burt died was an atypically cold night (well, cold by Tallahassee standards). When we arrived back at our townhouse, absolutely heartbroken, a cat we had seen around our apartment complex ran inside, presumably to escape the unbearable 45-degree weather. Despite being severely allergic to cats, I turned to Seth and said, “We’re keeping her.” I just couldn’t bear the thought of our house being without a pet, and having that cat around brought us some comfort. She was an absolutely gorgeous cat, if not a little rotund (we thought that she might be pregnant). Unfortunately, she also really aggravated my allergies to the point that it was unlivable. So, I focused on finding her a home. As luck would have it, I roped one of my friends into adopting her, and to this day, Mr. Yuki as he is now known (turned out that we are not good at telling a boy cat from a girl act), is a beloved and cherished cat who is truly living his best life.

After that experience, I got the idea that I might be able to do something like this on a more regular basis. My heart was still broken after losing Burt, and both Seth and I agreed that we simply weren’t ready to adopt another dog so early in the grieving process. Additionally, since this was my last year in graduate school, I knew I would be moving away in June, and having a pet would make the move a bit more difficult. But, we absolutely hated not having any animals in the house. There was a professor in my graduate department who I knew was very actively involved in animal rescue and fostering. So, I contacted her to find out if it would be a possibility for me, and she helped me get connected with the local humane society. The application process was pretty straightforward – I think they did a home visit to check out our townhouse, and they also needed proof that our landlord allowed pets. I believe there was some paperwork as well, but my memory is pretty fuzzy.

What it Involved

Once we were in the system, whenever there was a dog in need of fostering that met our criteria (we were only allowed dogs under 25 pounds in our apartment), we got a call from the humane society to see if we could take him/her on. The cool thing about fostering is that the humane society provided everything we needed at no cost to us (e.g., food, leash, collar, bed, flea/heartworm prevention, etc.). As broke students, this was a definite plus! Our main responsibility was to take care of the dog on a day-to-day basis, which was the fun part. We also really tried to get to know the dog so that we would be able to provide potential adopters with as much information as possible. For example, how did the dog behave around other dogs? How well is he/she house trained? What’s his/her energy level? etc. All of the dogs we fostered were featured on the humane society website. So, from time to time, potential adopters would call to inquire about them. If they passed the initial screening process from the humane society, it was our job as fosters to do a home visit to check out whether their house was suitable (i.e., it didn’t seem dangerous, that we weren’t turning the animal over to dog fighters or animal hoarders). We also would call references (e.g., previous veterinarians) to make sure we weren’t adopting the dog out to someone who wouldn’t treat him/her well. The thing that was really important to me as a foster was that I ultimately had veto power if I didn’t feel comfortable adopting one of the dogs out to someone. I of course got attached to most of the dogs we fostered (I admit that there were one or two “energetic” dogs that I was happy to send on their way, to loving homes of course!), but the fact that in every case, I was excited about the new owners that I had hand-picked made it so much easier to give them up. I also knew that if we ever encountered a dog that we just couldn’t part with, we would have the opportunity to adopt that dog ourselves. It just so happened that we were able to find such incredible homes for each dog and didn’t have any “failed” fosters, as it is commonly known in the animal rescue business (i.e., dogs that you intended to foster but ended up keeping for yourself).

Delilah

Maury the Chihauhau

Redman the Chihuahua

Reggie the Puppy from Hell

What it was like (emotionally)

Overall, it was a lot of fun. We fostered 6 dogs between December and May, and we loved each one of them in different ways. It was neat in that we got to test out what different kinds of dogs were like, without worrying about feeling guilty if we decided a dog just wasn’t our type (we’d just work harder in those cases to find a home that was a good fit). Some things were unexpected. We had never fancied ourselves chihuahua people, but after fostering two of them who defied the stereotypes of being yappy and annoying (Maury and Redman), we fell in love with this quirky little breed. We hope to one day adopt a chihuahua of our own. We also fostered one adorable, but completely wacky puppy named Reggie. He was just a couple months old and was a precious ball of fluff. But man, he was a handful. We learned from this that we just weren’t puppy people and decided firmly that any other dog we adopt in the future would be an adult. What you’re probably all wondering is what it was like the day that we had to bring the dogs to go to their forever homes. I won’t say it was easy, and I won’t say that I didn’t cry during the car ride home pretty much every time. But without exception, I took great comfort in the idea that these dogs had found homes that were honestly better than the one that I could offer them. And, there was always another dog waiting, needing us to foster him or her, so it was impossible to stay down for very long. The hardest dog to give up was our last foster, Delilah. She was seriously the sweetest, cutest little dog we had ever met. Her personality was perfect – she was equally happy to laze around on the couch or to play for two hours straight with another dog at the local dog park. Delilah never met a human or dog that she didn’t love, she was pretty much perfectly house trained from the get-go, and she totally stole our hearts. That said, we were still students living in a townhouse, we were moving away to two separate locations while I completed my one-year internship in Rhode Island, and we found Delilah an amazing home that offered her so much more than we were able to at the time. So, although Seth and I both shed some tears, we gladly gave Delilah to her true, forever home without hesitation. This was made easier by the fact that we kept in touch with her new adoptive “parents” and even had the chance to dog-sit her when they went out of town.

All in all, this was an experience that I will never forget. These dogs all helped us to heal from our loss, and I know that we helped them move forward into much better circumstances than where they had started out in life. I would highly recommend giving it a try. To those who say that they could never “give a dog up” after fostering, I’d say that I never thought I’d be able to do it either. I’ve always fallen hard for any animal I encounter and didn’t think I had it in me. But, I did feel like the mentality was different as a foster compared to how I’ve felt after adopting a dog. I always knew that the dogs weren’t “mine,” and as I already mentioned, I always ended up homing the dogs with owners who were incredible people. So, although a bit sad, I found the process to be very do-able. And of course, if it ever came down to it, we could have adopted any of the dogs that we fostered. So, if you are in a situation that would allow you that flexibility (i.e., you theoretically could adopt another dog if it came down to it), then what do you have to lose by giving fostering a try?!

Nowadays, Seth and I have two rescued beagles of our own, both of whom had been fostered by others before we adopted them. Plus, we have a cat, as my allergies apparently are much less severe than they were back in 2008. So, as I keep reminding Seth, the inn is currently full.

A few pieces of advice

1. Some of the dogs we fostered were not kid-friendly, and as is often the case with rescued animals, the degree of kid-friendliness was often unknown when we brought them into our home. This wasn’t a problem since we didn’t have kids, but if you do have small children in the house, fostering is probably not in the cards for you (but please consider it once you’re suffering from empty nest syndrome!).

2. We worked with a terrific humane society, and the rescuers really knew their stuff. Specifically, they were experts at identifying highly adoptable dogs from the local kill shelter and bringing them into the foster program. This meant that it was usually just a matter of weeks before a suitable home was found for the dogs we fostered. If you work with a rescuer who is less savvy (or has a tough time with the very difficult prospect of walking past less adoptable dogs at the shelter in the interest of helping a larger number of dogs find permanent homes), you might end up with a dog who stays with you for months upon months. We encountered this last summer when we agreed to foster an 11-year-old completely toothless chihuahua who was not house trained (and honestly, never would be) and growled and bit us (well, gummed us) whenever we tried to handle him. Obviously, it would take a very special person to be willing to adopt this type of dog, and it took over five months before such a home was identified. I definitely have a soft spot for special needs dogs, but in this example, I can’t help but think of how many more dogs we could have helped in that time if they were more adoptable. Sadly, highly adoptable dogs die in shelters every single day, especially in Alabama (where we live now).

3. If dog fostering seems too difficult, either emotionally or logistically, you might want to consider fostering a cat or two. Shelters are really overrun with cats, and according to the ASPCA, 41% of cats who enter shelters are euthanized (this is higher than the 31% figure for dogs). Cats are so darn low maintenance, and you wouldn’t even need to pay for kitty litter or food!

4. If you are healing from the loss of one of your pets, fostering can be a great way to get some companionship before you’re ready to fully open your heart to a new permanent resident. I think this really saved Seth and me while we were healing from our own loss.

So what do you think? Have you ever considered fostering an animal? If you think after reading this you might be, there are many local rescues. I can even point you in the direction. If you think you’re interested, but not into smaller animals, there’s this giant orange and black striped cat with big teeth that I wouldn’t mind having chase somebody else for a night.

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How Long Will I Grieve For My Dog? | No, YOU Need To Calm Down! says:

August 9, 2021 at 9:23 pm

[…] As you are wondering, “how long will I grieve for my dog?”, you may get some well-meaning, yet off-putting advice from others. They will be telling you to go get yourself a puppy and you’ll feel better. You might instantly view this as a “replacement dog”, and feel you could never do that. Here’s what you can do. Give yourself as much time as you need, but realize that you are not replacing them. You are just opening up a new spot in your family and heart. I’ve had 4 dogs at one time, and none of them were competing for a spot. What you probably need, though, is time to process. Bringing a new pup home may also bring with it the anxiety of losing them, too. You’ll need to get to where that isn’t uppermost on your mind. Remember, though, if you have children, they may be ready before you are. It might be okay to give in. Seeing them happy with a new dog may speed your healing. If not totally ready for that, read what Tracy had to say about fostering, and it’s healing benefits here. […]

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